From the time news of my pregnancy reached people's ears, the one thing I get asked without fail is if I want a boy or a girl. I'm sure it's a normal to ask because I've asked it a million times to mothers-to-be in the past. The ones that know me well didn't find the need to ask because they already knew that I want a girl. Infant I've always wanted to mother two girls, Always as in AL-WA-YS! I have absolutely nothing against raising boys, infact I have a favourite child in the whole wide world and adores me equally (I think 💓), my nephew. Somewhere between marriage and pregnancy I warmed up to the idea of having a baby boy as the second child😃.
The desire to raise girl children may have risen with having a lot of girls in my family, maybe because of the best times I had studying in an all-girl's convent, the fun of dressing up & even because I want to Be for my child what my mom is to me! One more reason and I think the most important one for the want to have a girl child is that I've missed having my father around. I've missed speaking to my girlfriends on how amazing and annoying my father is when it comes to going out or managing finances and likewise. So visualising G do the things that I didn't get to do with my father has been a constant thing from day one. I'm not sure if G is going to be a cool dad or a strict father, but all I want is to enjoy the father-daughter bond. I maybe selfish like that but I don't mind it at all.
I have a lot of relatives who constantly tell me the following:
'if u want a girl, U'll definitely have a boy'😏
'you shouldn't have gender expectations'
'you will go into depression once the baby is born' and so much more.
What if I have a baby boy? Am I going to give up my baby for adoption? HELL NO! I want a girl, yes but that does not mean that giving birth to a baby boy will push me into depression. Why?? Firstly because I am not stupid and then because I've been bonding with this little heart for 8 months now and I am going to fall in love again the minute I set my eyes on him/her. I think being pregnant and getting to feel the teeny weeny inside move like a rockstar has gotten me dreaming a lot about the future. The 'us' time for the baby and me has always been about imagining daily routine after the baby, telling the baby that the entire family will be head over heels with her/him, dreaming about holidays together, reading books together and everything else & It's one of the best memories I will carry for the longest time.
Be it a Girl or a Boy, this baby is going to turn my routine, time zone and pretty much everything upside down and I am going to give my everything and I can't be more excited!!💃💗
So for those of you worried about my mental health, take a chill pill. I will Love my baby boy as much as my baby girl.Till then, I will enjoy playing the guessing game and being pregnant.
